Since this week is Infertility Awareness Week I thought I might share our story. Most of you know bits and pieces of this story but if it helps even one person to not feel alone during their journey then it’s worth putting it out there.
Jared and I were married in June 2005. We basically started trying right away to get pregnant. A year went by and nothing. I asked questions at my annual OB appointment and he did some blood tests and prescribed Clomid (an oral infertility medication). After my blood tests came back I was diagnosed with PCOS and prescribed Metformin (also used for Diabetes patients). This medication did a number on my stomach. But I got used to it after a while.
After 5 months of Clomid and numerous other tests, acupuncture and no pregnancy my OB referred me to an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist). We tried Clomid with an IUI our first round with the RE and got pregnant! We got to see the heartbeat at 5 weeks with the RE and were released back to my OB. At 9 weeks we found the baby’s heart had stopped beating. I had miscarried. I had no symptoms of a miscarriage. It’s what they called a missed-miscarriage. I was at the appointment by myself and had to drive myself home. I was a wreck. I had a D&C the next day.
We waited 1 month before we tried again. This time we did injectable infertility meds with IUI. We did this twice with no success. In August 2007 I had to have a surgical procedure done to remove polyps. We started IUI with injectable medications again in October. Neither October or November worked. Our RE stated that she’d do one more IUI then we needed to think about IVF. Jared refused to talk about it. His opinion was that you didn’t talk about the next “game” until the current game was over. I on the other had wanted to know what we were going to do next. I had little faith that this last IUI would work. I didn’t want to try IVF, if we were going to spend that kind of money I wanted to move towards adoption. But Jared’s heart wasn’t open to that at the time. I let it go.
We did the last IUI in December and on December 30th I got a positive pregnancy test. I was excited but cautious. In January (on a Friday night) I started bleeding. I freaked out. My RE’s office said that some bleeding could be normal and they scheduled me for an appointment on Monday. Jared was helping my sister move to Des Moines that weekend so I was alone…again. At Monday’s appointment we couldn’t see the heartbeat yet (too soon) but my RE could see blood clots in there and what was happening as the baby and my uterus was growing it was pushing the blood clots out. I was so thankful that it didn’t look like another miscarriage. I ended up having a very non-eventful pregnancy with Caitlyn and delivered her in September 2008.
With Cole we tried naturally for a year again and when nothing came of that visited the RE again. It took 3 IUI’s with injectable medications to get pregnant the third time. I had some morning/all day sickness with Cole’s pregnancy throughout the first trimester and the rest of the pregnancy was uneventful.
This fourth pregnancy was a complete surprise. Jared and I were on completely different pages. He really wanted to try for a 3rd and I felt like we were complete with 2. I knew I didn’t want to do any type of treatment again so I told him that we could try naturally for a year and if nothing happened we’d stop trying. A year and a half after that conversation I was trying to convince him we were done trying. He wanted one more month. We both prayed. He prayed for a 3rd child. I prayed that God would give Jared peace with our decision to stop trying. Three weeks later we had a positive pregnancy test. Jared was so excited. I was in complete shock. I was more sick with this pregnancy and it lasted further into the 2nd trimester. I’m feeling much better now most days.
If anyone reading this is going through infertility, please know that you are not alone. It may feel that way because it seems to be a taboo topic but there are so many going through the same things. I may have gotten through my hurdles but the pain and frustration is still there at times.
God's plans were different than mine but they are better than we could ever imagine!