Since this
week is Infertility Awareness Week I thought I might share our story. Most of
you know bits and pieces of this story but if it helps even one person to not
feel alone during their journey then it’s worth putting it out there.
Jared and I
were married in June 2005. We basically started trying right away to get
pregnant. A year went by and nothing. I asked questions at my annual OB
appointment and he did some blood tests and prescribed Clomid (an oral
infertility medication). After my blood tests came back I was diagnosed with
PCOS and prescribed Metformin (also used for Diabetes patients). This
medication did a number on my stomach. But I got used to it after a while.
After 5
months of Clomid and numerous other tests, acupuncture and no pregnancy my OB
referred me to an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist). We tried Clomid with an
IUI our first round with the RE and got pregnant! We got to see the heartbeat
at 5 weeks with the RE and were released back to my OB. At 9 weeks we found
the baby’s heart had stopped beating. I had miscarried. I had no symptoms of a
miscarriage. It’s what they called a missed-miscarriage. I was at the
appointment by myself and had to drive myself home. I was a wreck. I had a
D&C the next day.
We waited 1
month before we tried again. This time we did injectable infertility meds with
IUI. We did this twice with no success. In August 2007 I had to have a
surgical procedure done to remove polyps. We started IUI with injectable
medications again in October. Neither October or November worked. Our RE
stated that she’d do one more IUI then we needed to think about IVF. Jared
refused to talk about it. His opinion was that you didn’t talk about the next
“game” until the current game was over. I on the other had wanted to know what
we were going to do next. I had little faith that this last IUI would work. I
didn’t want to try IVF, if we were going to spend that kind of money I wanted to
move towards adoption. But Jared’s heart wasn’t open to that at the time. I
let it go.
We did the
last IUI in December and on December 30th I got a positive pregnancy test. I was excited
but cautious. In January (on a Friday night) I started bleeding. I freaked
out. My RE’s office said that some bleeding could be normal and they scheduled
me for an appointment on Monday. Jared was helping my sister move to Des Moines
that weekend so I was alone…again. At Monday’s appointment we couldn’t see the
heartbeat yet (too soon) but my RE could see blood clots in there and what was
happening as the baby and my uterus was growing it was pushing the blood clots
out. I was so thankful that it didn’t look like another miscarriage. I ended
up having a very non-eventful pregnancy with Caitlyn and delivered her in
September 2008.
With Cole
we tried naturally for a year again and when nothing came of that visited the RE
again. It took 3 IUI’s with injectable medications to get pregnant the third
time. I had some morning/all day sickness with Cole’s pregnancy throughout the
first trimester and the rest of the pregnancy was uneventful.
This fourth
pregnancy was a complete surprise. Jared and I were on completely different
pages. He really wanted to try for a 3rd and I felt like we were
complete with 2. I knew I didn’t want to do any type of treatment again so I
told him that we could try naturally for a year and if nothing happened we’d
stop trying. A year and a half after that conversation I was trying to convince
him we were done trying. He wanted one more month. We both prayed. He prayed
for a 3rd child. I prayed that God would give Jared peace with our
decision to stop trying. Three weeks later we had a positive pregnancy test.
Jared was so excited. I was in complete shock. I was more sick with this
pregnancy and it lasted further into the 2nd trimester. I’m feeling
much better now most days.
If anyone
reading this is going through infertility, please know that you are not alone.
It may feel that way because it seems to be a taboo topic but there are so many
going through the same things. I may have gotten through my hurdles but the
pain and frustration is still there at times.
God's
plans were different than mine but they are better than we could ever imagine!
